Eventually Splash recovers from her failure. And, over the course of the next three years, she repeats this cycle eight times. Each time, Splash feels a renewed enthusiasm and sense of commitment after finding yet another deep sea swimming instruction book or program. And, again, each time, Splash wholeheartedly throws herself and all her energy into her efforts. Each time, Splash unfortunately also finds that she has failed yet again. And the time spent alone with chocolate ice cream increases with every failed program.
Adding to the very real fact that Splash has never been able to achieve her dream, with each subsequent failure she even begins to doubt her own abilities, her aptitude, and her resolve. As the failures mount, any time Splash begins a new swimming program, she isn’t just trying to achieve her dreams, her self-worth is now on the line. She is now also trying to prove to herself that she actually has capability and resourcefulness. And, because of this, these cycles of defeat have the unfortunate side effect of creating a new, negative self-image for Splash.
After three-plus years of trying, and failing to reach her goal of being a deep-sea swimmer, Splash finally resigns herself to her fate. But because that dream will never actually go away, her day-to-day life in her fish tank now lacks the same happiness and fulfillment it once did. In order to not feel completely worthless, Splash is forced to adopt the following beliefs:
1. She will never stop wanting to be a deep-sea swimmer, but she isn’t worthy, on some level, of being one. Deep-sea swimming must be reserved for the lucky fish who have wealthy parents, who have inside connections with the “right” fish, and are born with the right genes.
2. The books and programs promising to teach fish to be deep sea swimmers are all phony and nothing but alluring and hypnotically attractive lies, written to exploit the naïve dreams of little fish like her. The only thing those books really accomplish is making these “snake-oil salesfish” authors rich.
3. Because she has desired to be a deep-sea swimmer so badly and worked so hard at it, her failure makes her incredibly angry. It just isn’t fair that she can’t swim in the deep ocean like other fish do and she now has a bitterness toward life, and its lack of fairness, she’d never had in her younger days.
Have you ever felt the way Splash does? Have you, too, ever had a dream for yourself – a goal or desire that you wanted more than anything else but have been unable to achieve? If you’re like most people you have felt this way at some point in your life.
Stay tuned to this blog for more information about how to make those dreams a reality for you…